When Zim Comes Marching Home
by CeraJade
Summary: While trying to make a stupid history project for Skool go easier, and so he can pass onto JR. SKOOL, Zim messes up and he, Dib, Gaz, and Tak are stuck in the past. Can they survive a war...and each other...to make it home?
1. Chapter 1

So, I'm watching ZIM and writing my research paper on the Civil War, and my head just started going...so I had to write this. People, it's my head...if you like, send the kudos...if you don't, send the CONSTRUCTIVE criticism. I've written some other stories to in other places...and some readers can get mean. I love reviews, just be kind...pwease...anyways...ENJOY!

* * *

"GIR! You are bothering me…more than usual! Go upstairs and watch tv!"

Zim was in the main room of his lab, preparing to give his weekly report to the Tallest when Gir had come shooting down the elevator shaft giggling at an unthinkable high pitch, and proceed to push random buttons.

"I CAN'T!" Gir shouted back happily.

Zim raised an eyebrow. "Why not? Did you break the tv again? I told you, the human-pigs that are on the tv aren't IN it! You can't touch them!"  
Gir shook his head. "No…the tv is still a happy tv…" The little robot stopped pushing buttons and looked down at his feet.

Zim became nervous. "Well, then, what?"

Gir looked up. "Dibby and Gazzy are at the door!" He smiled, gave a surprised Zim a hug, and ran back up the elevator shaft.

"WHAT? How did those stink-meats get at the door?? Where are my gnomes? Computer, upstairs, NOW!"

* * *

After grabbing his wig and lenses, Zim made the door transparent to see if it was really Gaz and Dib. Gaz was impatiently tapping her foot while Dib was standing on tiptoe trying to look through the side window. Seizing a moment to hurt Dib, Zim suddenly swung the door open, knocking the boy onto the grass. Gaz snickered.

"What do you what?" Zim asked.

Dib turned over and rubbed his knee. "We have to go to Skool early, remember? We have our project…"

Zim sighed and slapped his forehead. "Right…stupid Skool. Why do I go?" He slammed the door, yelled something at Gir, and then returned with a binder.

"Remind me again why we were partners for this filthy…thing?" Zim grumbled as he started down the walk, following Dib and Gaz.

"Ms. Bitters chose the partners, there's nothing we could've done. Being partners in a history project…for 6th grade…is a legal binding contract and…breaking it is a capital crime." Dib stopped. "Why _do_ we go to this Skool?" He asked thoughtfully.

Gaz turned to the two boys. "If you don't hurry up, I'll go back on my agreement to help you with this project…and you BOTH will suffer horrible consequences for wasting my time!"

Dib and Zim hurried to catch up to Gaz. They walked in silence for a while, until Dib asked, "Did you finish the written part?"

Zim nodded. "Yes, I even made a cover page," he handed the binder to Dib and asked, "Do you have the presentation?"

Dib nodded too as he flipped through the binder. The project was counting for 100 percent of their history grade, and Dib wanted to make sure Zim didn't screw anything up. As he flipped through the binder, though, Dib was not disappointed. He glanced over at Zim.

"You paid attention to Ms. Bitters lecture on plagiarism, right? This isn't some Oxford dissertation, is it?"

"You accuse me, ZIM, of _stealing_ such intelligence as that! Stupid worm-baby!"

"Fine, FINE! You did this yourself!" Dib switched sides so that Gaz was between him and Zim, and continued to flip through the binder. As they reached the Skool, most of the 6th grade was arriving as well. The project consisted of partnerships of two or three, and the students were responsible for putting together an oral and written presentation of a moment in history they drew out of a hat. This grade, along with their other subjects, would determine if they were good enough to attend Jr. Skool the next fall.

Zim and Dib had been working for weeks on their subject, the American Civil War. Dib was surprised at how diligently Zim was working on the subject, but it didn't take long for him to figure out that the only reason Zim wanted to go to Jr. Skool was to gain more information about Earth. Caught between a rock (failing the project so Zim can't go to Jr. Skool) and a hard place (he wouldn't be able to go as well), Dib decided to just give in and work on the project. Since Zim's computer programs wouldn't be compatible with anything on Earth, Dib took responsibility for making the visual while Zim typed up the written report and got the costumes.

As they entered the Skool with the rest of the kids, Dib handed the binder back to Zim.

"Wow…that was actually…really good. Where did you find all those primary sources? Like, the letters and diary's…and that letter from General Meagher to Lincoln, where did you find that? I didn't even think that was real…but all your citations are correct."

Zim looked around nervously. "Oh, you know…I got it from history…"

Dib was about to question Zim more, but Gaz slapped him on the back of the head.

"Do you have my costume? And my money?" She asked angrly.

Dib gave Gaz a huge wad of bills as Zim dug a garment bag out of his Pak. "Here you go," Zim said. Gaz hissed at him, took the clothes, and left to change. "Spawn of another realm…" Zim whispered after her.

Dib pulled Zim by the arm. "C'mon, we have to see when we are to go." He lead Zim up to a crowed message Kiosk that was running the announcements for the day. He stood a tip toe and scanned the list of presentations.

"We're…last." He said. "We aren't schedualed until…11! No one will be here for ours, everyone will want to go to lunch!" Part of their grade was also how well satisfied the student body was with their presentation.

"Oh, I think they'll stay when they see what we have," Zim said smugly.

Dib looked at him. "What did you give Gaz to wear?"

Zim paused for a moment. "Clothes."


	2. Chapter 2

Yeah...sorry for the chapter names. I have a couple stories going, and I need to keep my uploads organized.

* * *

At 8 am, the bell rang. All of the Skool was gathered into the Auditorium with the 6th graders behind stage. One by one, Zim and Dib looked between the curtains and watched their classmates go. Finally, it was almost their turn.

"Where's Gaz?" Dib asked, looking around. He and Zim had changed into their costumes as well. Again, Dib was amazed at how accurate Zim was in keeping true to the era. He was dressed in Union blue, and his merits on his chest were equal to that of General Sherman's. Zim, in Confederate grey, looked as though he just fled Gettysburg.

Zim shrugged. "I don't know, I haven't seen her in a while…" He trailed off when he saw Gaz out of the corner of his eye.

"Gaz!" he whispered. "Where have you been? Are you ready? Do you know your part?"

Dib turned too and saw Gaz. She was dressed in a simple day dress of the time- white, shortsleeved with ruffles and a low neck. A green sash was tied at her natural waste and a giant bow on her back. She had her hair back into a low bun, with a simple green ribbon chocker at her neck. Green emeralds dangled from her ears.

"Wow, Gaz! You look like you could be a Union wife!" Dib noticed how low the bodice was cut. "But…I don't like that top…you need something higher. Zim what else do you have?"

Zim, however, was looking very confused. "Well…the dress I _originally_ gave her. That's not the one. She's supposed to be a Southern Bell….where did you get that?"

Before Gaz could answer, another girl stepped out from behind her. She, too, was in Civil War dress, but she was wearing the ball gown that Zim had brought for Gaz.

It was a solid blue, like the color of moonlight snow, and it billowed out into a bell fashion. It too was short sleeved, with ruffles, and a decoration of lace around the v-necked collar. This girl too wore a chocker of ribbon, but it was the same blue of the dress…and her eyes. But…her skin…

"T…Tak?" Zim stammered. Dib's mouth dropped. Tak sneered. She was wearing a wig of dark brown hair, done in ringlets and curls.

"Tak!" Zim found his voice. "What are you doing here? You were thrown off into space! And why aren't you in your other disguise?"

"I didn't have much freedom as a hologram. You're right, these beings are stupid, and just lenses and a wig works."

Zim walked to her and grabbed both her arms. "But _what_ are you doing here?" He hissed into her face.

She smiled again and said in a cold voice with a southern accent, "Now, Lieutenant Zim, is that how you treat a lady? I'm just a poor Southern Bell, here for the performance. Thank goodness my cousin Gaz is the same waist as I or I do not know _what_ would have become of me!"

Behind them, Ms. Bitters whispered, "Dib, Zim…your filth is up next. Be ready."

Zim glared into Taks eyes for a moment, and then let her go. He paced a few paces, then grabbed Dib and drug him over to the other side of the small room.

"I don't know what she is doing, but she knows what we are doing. We're just going to have to adjust."

Dib nodded. "You're right, we don't have time to deal with it. She can…sing or something."

Zim punched Dib in the arm. "Don't agree with me." Rubbing his arm, Dib followed Zim back to Gaz and Tak.

"Ok," Zim whispered. Behind them, the audience was clapping as the performance before them was finishing. They had about two minutes while the grade-judgement was given before they were to go on.

"Ok…Dib and Gaz…you're still going to talk. Tak, I don't know why or how, but you seem to know what's going on here." Tak nodded, an evil smirk still on her face. Zim thought fast. "I originally was going to just…well, die on stage. But…since you're here…we're going to use you. Do you know the song 'Ain True Love'?"

Tak nodded again. Suddenly, Ms. Bitters was standing behind them, growling.

"You little gits had better get on that stage now…every second you waste, your grade is dropped!"

Without another word, the four walked to the opening for the stage.

"You two wait until Zim and I introduce you, this is kinda like a play," Dib told Gaz and Tak. They both just staired at him. "Uh…ok then.." Dib nodded to Zim, who motioned to the tech guy to start the audio and visual, took a deep breath, and stepped out on stage.

* * *

The first fifteen minutes of the performance went smoothly. Dib and Zim remembered all their lines perfectly, and there wasn't a glitch to be found in the video/audio. The play was Zim and Dib were cousins, Zim living outside Atlanta as a cotton plantation owner, and Dib in New York as a lawyer. They went through the causes of the war as a dialogue of conversations and letters between the two. Once they both signed up for their respectful armies, it was time for the girls to come out. Dib went first.

"Dear Cousin Judah," he said, pretending to dictate a letter to a servant. Behind them, on the screen, images of soldiers getting ready for war passed by.

"I regret to hear about your mother. Aunt Scarlet was always kind to me when I would visit. My regards to Uncle William, for now the entire run of the plantation is on him, with you leaving for the War.

"My dearest Cousin, I beg of you one last time to reconsider. Sister Beth has been keeping company with General Grant, and she has informed me that the Yankee army has an _astounding_ amount of wealth and resources. Please, reconsider. I will never ask you to drop your cause, but please, take your father and sisters, and flee. Leave Atlanta and head to St. Louis, or even further West. The government is giving great land grants for California and Oregon. I hear there is even _gold_!"

As Dib was dictating, Gaz walked out onto stage. She held her head high and walked in a manner that no one had ever seen before. She pretended to be at a party and listening to all the generals and officers speak. When Dib finished his portion, the lights dimmed on Dib's side of the stage and went up on Zim's. Zim, pretending to have just read the letter, marched angrily around in a circle, dictating his own "letter".

"Thaddeus: You ask of me to leave my land but keep my cause? Your request is as impossible as asking a bee to stay away from the honeysickle yet continue to make honey. I do regret that this War will tear us apart, but Lincoln is a tyrant, and I must take my stand for my father! I have a message for General Grant. We do not fear whatever weapon you have, for we have something more: God."

After this line, they were supposed to move on to the battles, but Tak was still backstage. If Zim didn't bring her out, she for sure would do something to ruin the performance. Zim glanced at Dib, who nodded slightly. Zim would have to adlib.

"I have some lighter news, Tad. Do you remember Catherine, from the Midsummer Ball in Atlanta? Well, I am pleased to tell you that I made Kitty my bride the week before last. When this War has ended, perhaps you and Beth would enjoy a trip with us to the coast, I would gladly like to introduce you properly."

As he finished, Tak was walking about next to him. She came to stand by his side, and just as the lights were fading so the students could watch the next portion of the video, she placed her hand on his shoulder.

"Your _wife_?" she hissed.

"Well, Tad had a sister, so I figured I could have a wife. I'm supposed to die, so you'll be a widow, just wait."

Tak snorted softly. "Well…I hope your rich."


	3. Chapter 3

Meanwhile, back at Zim's base, Gir was upstairs on the couch, covered in cheese and giggling at the Angry Monkey on the tv, when a siren blared out. Screaming, Gir shot off the couch and went to hide behind the tv.

"Gir!" the computer said. "Gir, you need to contact Zim, there is a malfunction with the Jumper."

Shaking, Gir peaked around from behind the tv. "Who is that? I'm sorry, I'll never shave a hamster again!"

"What?" Computer asked. "Gir, it's the Computer! You need to get Zim."

"Oh! HI COMPUTER!!! Where have you been?"

Computer sighed. "In the _house_, Gir!" A cord fell from somewhere and hooked onto Gir's back. "I'm programming you with this information so you can comprehend it. If Zim doesn't come back now…"

Gir started to scream again. "Oh Noooooooo! I need to find my master, or he'll be gone!" He detached the cord from his back, jumped into his doggy suit, and shot out the door on his rockets towards the Skool.

* * *

At the Skool, Dib and Zim were setting up for the final scene. It was 11:28, and they were on a perfect schedule. Dib was starting to get excited. _I can't believe we did it! I'm going to Jr. Skool!_

Zim, being a Lieutenant, was acting as though he were preparing his command.

"Men, you will fight for Glory! You will fight for…my dog?"

Gir ran onto the stage on all fours, like a real dog, and started barking, trying to get Zim's attention. Dib's high hopes dropped to his gut. Gaz and Tak were standing on the side, taking the role of nurses. Zim turned to Tak, who was playing as a Confederate nurse.

"Woman! Get this mutt out of here!" He glared at Gir. "And shoot him, we can use him to feed the troops later."

Tak's evil grin returned as she stepped for ward to remove Gir. Zim and Dib were taking their places for the last charge when suddenly Gir, going into a rare defensive mode, broke free from Tak.

"Master! You have to get back to the base!"

Zim's eyes widened in fear as he turned back to Gir.

"No!" Tak yelled out. She reached for Gir, but he evaded to the right and she tripped over her many skirts and toppled onto Gaz. There was a bright flash of white light, and then a grunt as Gaz and Tak landed…on a dirt road.

Zim and Dib were still standing, but Gir was gone, as was the rest of the auditorium. They were standing in the middle of a dirt road, with high stalks of corn surrounding them. At one end of the road, there was a thicket, at the other a bridge to a river. It was a bright summer day, and birds were chirping, butterflies flying.

Dib looked around. "What…where are we? What is this? Zim!" He took a step towards the alien. "_What did you do?_"

Zim's eyes were still wide as he tried to take in the scenery. "I…I didn't do this. At least…I didn't _mean _too…"

Across the bridge, they heard a man shout and the sound of wheels and horses. Acting fast, Zim grabbed Tak off of Gaz.

"We need to hide! Into the woods!" He lead the way as the others followed. They made it just in time to see a small band of men dressed in Union uniforms ride by with a hospital wagon. After they had gone, Dib stepped out onto the road.

"Zim…was that…"

Zim nodded as he came out too. "Yes, it was…but they were back at Chancelorville, Virginia…I remember that medic…"

Dib punched him in the arm. "You _remember_ him? How old _are_ you?"

Rubbing his arm and stepping out of reach, Zim gave a nervous laugh. "No, I haven't been on Earth that long…I just…took a little vacation last weekend…"

Getting angry, and scared, Dib stepped forward, his hands balled into fists. "Where are we?"

Zim backed up until he was against a tree. "I don't know….but I know _when_ are we. It's about 1863, since that human is still alive." From behind, Gaz's arms came around the tree and wrapped around Zim's neck, choking him.

"You brought us back in time?" she yelled. All Zim could do was make choking noises.

"Gaz, stop!" Dib yelled. "Just grab his arms so he can't run!" Gaz reluctantly let go and Zim gasped for air.

"I told you…_I_ didn't do this! Yes, we are back in time, but I didn't bring us here."

"But you've been here before?" Dib asked. When Zim didn't answer right away, Dib punched him in the stomach. "Haven't you??"

Coughing, Zim gasped, "Yes. It's where I got your Union and my Confederate uniform."

Dib's eyes widened. "You mean…this is a _dead_ man's uniform? An actual Union General died in this?"

"Not a general, I just had my computer make credits so you looked like a general. It's an enlisted uniform. Same with mine. And no, they weren't dead, just…in the hospital…dying."

Gaz let Zim's arms drop. "So…where did you get my dress?"

"I found that one at a thrift shop. It was harder for me to get women's clothes here." Zim started to pace. He was puzzled…why did they make this jump back…_Jump!_ He stopped dead in his tracks as it hit him. "Oh no," he said softly.

"What?" Dib asked.

Sheepishly, and fear full of Gaz's hold and Dib's punch, Zim started to back away again. "I used a device from the Irken military called a 'Jumper'. It allows you to go back in time, observe, interact, and even borrow for a short while without disturbing the time-space continuum. So…I borrowed."

"Hm…well, obviously, there was a glitch!" Gaz shouted.

Zim flinched. "Everything comes with a glitch, Gaz! You should know that by now. Anything in a certain time is covered with a substance called smúit, kind of marking it for that era. The Jumper is supposed to nullify the smúit so the object can be in a different time. If the Jumper is disrupted, then smúit takes over and brings the object back to its time. Something must have happened…" He stopped in mid-sentence and turned to Tak, who was still standing in the thicket off the road.

"_YOU_!" He screamed. "You disrupted the Jumper! You…but how?"

Tak walked out onto the road with her head held high. "Yes, I did. Last night. I disabled your gnomes…"

"THAT'S why we got by!" Dib shouted out.

"…and your stupid SIR didn't even notice me. I'd been following you around, and I saw that you didn't get a dress for Gaz from this time, so I went back and found one. I offered it to her this morning…and of course she took it. It was less frilly than the other one, more her comfort level. All I had to do was wait, and then POOF! You, the big headed kid, and Gaz…"

"Why didn't you use _my_ name?" Dib asked.

"QUIT INTERRUPTING! You three would be gone, stuck in the past forever, and I would be free to take Earth for the Tallest and become an Invader once more! But then your stupid SIR decided to become smart and he ruined my plan."

Zim could do nothing but steam at what Tak was saying. He couldn't believe how Gir could let her get by! Before he could say anything, Gaz stepped in.

"So, if the dress you're wearing is from the 21st century, then why are you here with us?"

"Because I fell on you, I was touching you when the Jump happened."

Silence followed Tak's speech as each one tried to comprehend what was happening. In the distance, they could hear some more shouts as another group of soldiers were coming.

Dib looked around. "Well, standing here isn't going to help. We need to get out of here..." he looked at his uniform and Zim's. "And we need to find some new clothes. You two might be ok, but we'll be in trouble."

"We're going to be in trouble no matter what. We're young, able bodied boys who aren't fighting. Home Guard will find us." Zim added angrily as he lead the way back into the forest for them to hide. "And from what I saw last time I was here, Home Guard doesn't mean Friendly Guard."


	4. Chapter 4

They walked in silence until the shouts of the soldiers were gone, and didn't stop until they came to a creek. With out a word, Zim hopped over the banks and sat on a rock on the opposite side, his back to the rest. So many things were going through the young Irken's mind.

_I can't believe Tak! It's a stupid MISSION! Well…no, it's not stupid…but why didn't she wait the 70 years? It was 50 years ago, she only had 20 left! _He glanced over his shoulder. Dib was reaching down to drink some water and Gaz was laying on her back looking up at the sky. Tak was looking at Zim, tapping her foot. Zim turned away again.

_Being mad won't help…we need to get out of here, we could die! Time to think like an Invader, Zim_…he shook his head. _No, not an Invader, I'm not trying to take over the time. What was it about the Jumper if it malfunctioned…_

He heard the others start to talk behind him.

"I'm going to scout ahead," Dib was saying. "Before we do anything, we need new clothes. There's a trail here, I think it might lead to a farm."

Gaz sat up. "We shouldn't spilt up, we don't know how to act in this age. It's better if we're all together and can keep tabs on each other."

"I've been studying 1863 for four months, Gaz. I think I can handle being alone for an hour." Dib started to walk north. Zim stood up and jumped back over the creek.

"Gaz is right. We shouldn't split up."

Dib turned around and crossed his arms. "Oh, now that _you_ agree with Gaz that makes me want to NOT follow that advice even more! Why should we listen to you, you got us here!"

Zim groaned. "No, you stink-dumb! Didn't you listen to any of that conversation! _Tak_ got us here!"

Dib raised an eyebrow. "You can't really blame this on her. I mean, yeah, sure she did ruin the Jumper, but _you_ gave her the chance by coming back here in the first place to get the clothes! Why didn't you just go to a costume shop like everyone else does?"

Tak cleared her throat. "I'm standing right here, you know."

As though he didn't hear her, Zim started walking towards Dib. "I don't have stinking _moneys_ stupid big head! To get Gaz's dress was hard enough! Besides, I needed to find material for the written report too. And since this stinking stupid project would decide my fate on this poor excuse for a planet, I figured what better way to write a report on a time period than actually _being_ in that time period?"

Dib threw his arms up and started walking towards Zim in return. "Yeah, WHAT a great idea, except for one thing…HOW are we going to get to Jr. Skool now? We're stuck in _1863_!"

The two boys were standing face to face now and it looked like that for the first time, Dib and Zim would get in an actual fist fight. Tak grabbed Zim's arms and Gaz grabbed Dib's.

"Look," Tak said. "As much as I hate helping you, I'm stuck in this time period too so I'm going to help. Stop fighting. And I have an idea about the clothes. We don't need to steal anything, I have some cloth and a sewing kit in my Pak. Gaz and I can adjust things."

"I don't sew," Gaz said flatly as she let go of Dib's arms.

Tak let go of Zim's as well and reached into her Pak. "You will now. Both of you, off with the uniforms."

Dib glared at Zim for a moment, and then started to unbutton his jacket. Zim did the same as Gaz and Tak ripped off a layer of petticoat for the boys to wrap themselves in while adjustments were being made. Tak started ripping her lace as well.

"What are you doing?" Zim asked. "Do you know how hard it was for me to get moneys for that?"

"I look out of place. Girls don't just walk around with lace. I'm going to use it to make myself and Gaz some head cover." Zim gave her a funny look.

"I told you I've been following you around for a while. I know a thing or two about the Civil War," she said as she layed out her sewing kit.

Gaz handed Dib her ripped petticoat to wrap around his waist when he had everything but his boxers off. "Since when do Irken Invader's know how to sew?" he asked as he handed Tak his clothes.

"We are trained as soldiers first, Invader's second. Just like Human soldiers, we are taught the basic needs to survive in the field. If you're uniform or tent or cold gear is torn, you are the only one who can fix it." Zim answered as he too handed Tak his uniform. Tak looked up and reflect that she had actually never seen another Irken without covering before. He was still small, but she could see he wasn't just a stick, there were muscles as well…quite a few. He wore a traditional Irken loincloth- tight breeches going just to his thigh with a piece of cloth covering the front and a piece covering the back.

It took Tak a moment to realize that she was staring, and when she saw that Zim was looking back at her, she did what was equivalent to a human blush and looked back down at her sewing. Zim cleared his throat.

"Should I just stand here in my mundu while I wait?"

Tak's "blush" got darker as she handed him her ripped petticoat. "Sorry," she mumbled. Zim gave her a quizzical look as he wrapped it around his waist. _What is wrong with her?_ He walked over to where Dib was sitting as Tak started to teach Gaz what to do. Zim sat down next to Dib and the two boys sat in silence for a moment, listening to the girls exchange idle chatter.

_This is ridiculous_, Zim thought. _We can deal with this later, but what we need to figure out now is how to get out of here. I wish there was a way to talk…_Zim sat up and gasped.

"What?" asked Dib.

"I think I remembered something about the Jumper. Tak!" He called back. "Tak, we're covered with smúit too, right?"

Tak shrugged her shoulders. "Yes, I think so. But we're living organisms. Smúit usually only has an effect on non-living things…"

Zim interrupted as he stood up to pace. "Yes, I know _that_. But since I'm still covered in smúit and Gir is back in the 21st century…couldn't I still talk to him? He's my SIR unit…so, technically…and unfortunantly…he's one half of me."

Tak put her sewing down and thought for a moment. "Yes…I suppose he is…you could try."

Zim whipped his communicator out of his Pak to call Gir.

* * *

Back in the 21st Century, Gir had just got away from the Skool. After four students just disappeared right in front of the entire student body, things were getting crazy. Police were everywhere, and Professor Membrane was about to arrive to figure out where his children went.

Gir had never been alone like this before. Sure, when Zim would go to Skool, Gir would be alone, but Zim always came back, and now he understood that Zim wasn't even in this world anymore. Scared, Gir flew all the way back to the base. He burst through the door, screaming and crying.

"Computer! He's gone! My master…what do I do? The humans…" A loud wail came from the terrified robot as he crumbled into the fetal position on the floor.

From somewhere, a robotic hand came down and patted Gir on the back.

"I know, Gir, I was monitoring the Jumper. He's in 1863." Gir seemed not to hear this as he cried louder, and a small puddle was forming under him. Annoyed, Computer's "hand" stopped patting Gir and slapped him across the face.

"Get a hold of yourself! You are Irken technology! You can get through this!"

Gir sniffled. "Irken? IRK!" He jumped out of his dog suit and hurried down to the main room of the base.

"What are you doing?" Computer asked.

"The big ones! The…the…" Gir scratched his head.

"The Tallest?"

"YEAH! They can help me! They can find Zim!" He punched some buttons, and a moment later Tallest Red and Purple were on the screen.

"What now, Zim?" Red asked annoyed. Purple wasn't even paying attention, he was talking to someone off screen.

"He's not here!" Gir shouted at the screen. Purple stopped talking and looked at the robot too. Red raised an eyebrow.

"O…k…so then what do _you_ want…Gir?" he asked.

Tearful, Gir (with the help of Computer) explained to the Tallest what had happened- Zim using the Jumper a week ago, Tak showing up today, and then the malfunction.

"And now…and now…I'm just alone." Gir finished. He hiccupped.

Purple and Red were silent for a moment as they digested the information. _Zim…gone for good?_

Purple spoke first. "Well…this is unfortunate…Gir. But what do you want us to do about it. _You're_ his SIR unit. _You_ fix it."

If possible, Gir's face got even sadder. "But…I don't know how. Zim never let me near it. He never lets me do anything anymore…I usually make it 'splode. Can't you help?"

Purple looked amused, but Red looked worried.

"You say he disappeared in front of hundreds of people?"

Gir nodded and hiccupped again.

"We'll discuss this with our techies and call you back." The screen went black.

Gir looked at the screen for a moment longer, sighed, and fell onto his butt. He was about to talk to Computer, when his communicator started blinking.

Confused, and scared, Gir answered it.

"He…hello?"

"Gir!" Zim's voice crackled through the speaker. "Gir, can you hear me?"

"Master!" Gir squealed. "Master, I've misseded you sooo much!"

"Gir!" The connection was coming and going. "We've gone back in time, the Jumper malfunctioned. You need to fix it so we can come back!"

Gir scratched his head. "Master, if you're back in 1863, how am I talking to you? Are you borned yet? If you aren't, then I'm not real yet…but I'm talking to you now….is this all in my mind…"

Zim yelled loudly in frustration. "Gir, I know you're a complete and udder MORON but you HAVE to listen to me! Contact the Tallest, they need to get us out of here, now! Everything is at stake, the entire Skool saw us leave, and heard _you_ talk about the base!"

Gir nodded his head even though Zim couldn't see him. "Yes, my Lord. I've already talked to the Tallest, though."

Zim was surprised. "Really? Ok…what did they say?"

"That they would call me back."

Zim was silent for a moment. "How soon?"

"I dunno."

The signal was fading. "Look, Gir, we have to move on. But as soon as the Tallest call back, _call me_. Do you understand this? Repeat what I just said."

"As soon as the Tallest call, call you." Gir repeated perfectly.

Satisfied, Zim ended the connection. Gir was thinking about running upstairs to grab some snacks while waiting when the doorbell rang. He looked around.

"Computer?" Gir asked.

"Just ignore it, Gir. You don't always have to answer a doorbell."

But the doorbell rang again, and Gir could faintly hear pounding. Computer brought up an image on screen of outside. It was Professor Membrane and a police officer.


	5. Chapter 5

This is turning out alot longer than I thought it would be...but there's some thoughts that want to escape from my head. Sorry!

* * *

"There," said Tak as she held up Zim's breeches. She had finished Dib's first, and as he was redressing, Gaz went behind a tree to make her dress look more plain. Tak handed the clothes to Zim. He unrapped himself and gave the petticoat back to Tak so she could do adjustments to her clothes as well. It didn't take her very long before she looked like a simple farmhand.

Once everyone was reclothed, there was nothing left to do but set off for a town. Zim had climbed to the top of a tree and spotted a town a few miles to the west. They made their way back to the road and started the hike. For about a mile, no one said anything, each in their own thoughts. Zim was worried about Gir.

_What if the Tallest don't help him? I mean…of course they will…but he's all alone. I've never left him alone before…why hasn't he called back yet? What if he can't? Maybe I should try him again…_

He was in mid thought when Tak slowed down to walk next to him, leaving Gaz and Dib a few paces ahead.

"You're thinking hard…I can see the smoke coming out your antennae," she said softly.

Zim grunted at the joke. He was still too mad at her to make small talk. They walked a few minutes in silence again. Tak tried again.

"Does it all fit ok?"

Zim didn't look at her, but he answered, "What do you care?"

Tak frowned. "I was just asking." She was confused as to why it bothered her that Zim was angry. After all, her whole purpose _was_ to get rid of him. He _had_ ruined her life. She looked at him more closely. Zim was really worried, she could tell, and every so often he would glance at Dib and Gaz, as though he were watching them like a parent watches a child. Tak was going to try to talk again when they heard a horse clopping around the corner ahead.

It was a young boy, older than Dib but not old enough to be called a man. He was riding a caramel mare and carrying a large satchel at his side, and a gun on his other side.

Gaz and Dib stopped to wait for Zim and Tak to catch up. Before the boy reached them, Zim whispered, "Let me talk."

The boy reigned in his horse. "Good day," he said.

Zim nodded. "And to you. Could you be so kind as to help us? See," Zim gestured to the others. "My cousins, our friend, and I have been on a walk and I fear I do not know where we are. What is the nearest town?"

The boy motioned behind him. "About three miles back is Gettysburg." He gave Zim a weird look. "I say, you have been on a long hike."

Zim smiled. "My cousin Beth has recently recovered from a long sickness, and she longed to stretch her legs."

The boy was satisfied with that answer. "Have you been in Gettysburg long? I must say I have not seen you in the common."

"We are new to Gettysburg." Zim answered. He decided not to go into detail.

After a moments silence, the boy held out his hand. "Nathanial Bacon."

Zim reached up. "Judah…Flaherty. And these are my cousins Thaddeus Flaherty…" Dib stepped forward to shake hands. "And Elizabeth Flaherty." Gaz did an awkward curtsey. Zim motioned to Tak.

"And a friend of Beth and Tad's family, Catherine…Malone." Tak also curtsied. Nathanial seemed satisfied with their names and their excuse for being on the road.

"I must be moving on," he said. "I shall return on the marrow, and perhaps I will see you?"

Zim cocked his head. "Perhaps?"

"Surely you will be attending Miss Adelia's Summer Ball? She holds it every end of June, and all are welcome, no invitation needed."

Zim bowed his head. "Yes, you will perhaps see us there then."

With a smile, Nathanial nugged his horse and started away at a fast trot.

When he was gone, Dib cried out, "End of June…and Gettysburg! And why are they still having a ball? They are in the middle of a war!"

Zim started walking towards Gettysburg. "Dib, it's 1863, not the 21st century. Warfare here is different. It was actually considered a past time to sit on the sidelines and watch a battle. Having a ball is normal."

"Where did you learn that?" Gaz asked.

"I'm an Invader. Retaining knowledge is what I do." Zim said in a voice that suggested _ask one more question and I'll punch you_.

After half an hour, Zim let Dib and Gaz lead again so he could lag behind and return to his thoughts. Tak, however, still had more to say.  
"You knew how to talk to that human boy. Where did you learn that?"

Zim stopped and turned to Tak. "I told you, I'm an _invader_…unlike you." Zim knew in the back of his mind that this was a low blow, but he was getting really annoyed with Tak's questions and the fact that she made them come to 1863.

Dib heard Zim say this, and he knew that this was going to get ugly between the two. He pulled Gaz's arm and hissed "Walk faster."

Gaz pulled back. "No, I want to see this. One of them is going to lay the smack down and I wanna watch!" She stopped, walked to the side of the road, tucked her dress under her, and got comfy. Dib sighed and went to sit next to her.

Zim and Tak weren't paying attention to Dib and Tak, however.

"Excuse me?" Tak asked, putting attitude into her stance. "I _would_ be an invader if someone…"

Zim threw his hands in the air. "Yes, _of course_…it's _my_ fault you didn't get to your test on time…because I _had _to have my snack."

Tak paused. "Well…yeah….that's actually what I was just going to say."

"Remind me Tak, how much time was there before your test when I shut off the power?"

"An hour."

Zim nodded. "Exactly. So _why_ were you still in your room? Weren't we supposed to report to the Brain an hour before the test anyways? If you would've just followed the rules, you wouldn't have been stuck in your room."

Tak screeched. "Are you _serious_? You are going to blame that on _me_? You…you don't even deserve this mission, did you know that? This wasn't even a real mission!"

"Yeah, yeah…you told me that before, and the Tallest said you were lying. Just admit it…I am the better invader, this is my planet, and you're just being a sore loser."

Tak steamed at this and paced in a circle for a moment. From the sidelines, Gaz whispered to Dib, "Do you still think he's really an invader, or that he's just an idiot?"

Dib shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know…I haven't seen much proof…either way, I guess."

Tak stopped pacing and a slow smile spread across her face. "Well, since you're going to lose this mission after this anyway, I might as well show you." A screen popped out of Tak's Pak.

"As you know, our Pak's are set to record our every waking moment…this, _Invader_ Zim, is my conversation with the Tallest the last time I was on Earth."

A few memories passed by before the screen focused on an image of the Tallest. Zim could hear Tak's voice coming from the background.

_"…and so you see, my Tallest, I believe I am right in proving myself in stealing Zim's mission. I can show you that I am_ much _more capable than that idiot-brain ever was."_

_Red and Purple looked at each other for a moment and then burst out laughing._

_"You…you can have that stinking planet," Purple gasped between breathes._

_"My Tallest, I don't understand," Tak said in a confused voice._

_"Zim never was a real invader. After his disaster in Impending Doom I…how could he be? He's as idiotic and thickheaded as you think he is." Red said._

_Purple nodded, wiping tears from his eyes. "Yeah, we just sent him there to get rid of him. He didn't last long on Foodcourtia."_

_Tak didn't say anything to the Tallest for a moment while they wound down from their laughter. Red continued once he was under control._

_"You do understand, however, that we can't challenge the Brain in giving you the_ official _title of invader…but if you can crush Zim and do something with that planet, we will give you the merit of conquering a world and assign you a new one. You still won't be called Invader until the 20 years is up, but you can get a head start. How does that sound?"_

_"You won't be disappointed, my Tallest, I assure you,"_ they heard Tak say as the memory faded out and Tak returned the screen to her Pak.

She looked at Zim with a satisfied smile. "See? And don't try to say I altered it, you know there isn't any technology to alter a Irken's memory chip."

Zim stood silent for a moment as he digested what he had just seen. _It's all a lie? No, no the Tallest said _I _was chosen for this special mission…but, you can't alter a memory chip…_

Tak's smile faded as she saw the emotion on Zim's face as he finally came to terms with what he had seen. She looked behind Zim at Dib and Gaz. Gaz was snickering in disbelief, but Dib had a look of shock, and he was slowly shaking his head. Tak looked back at Zim.

"Zim…I…"

Zim shook his head and walked a few paces away. He too looked at Gaz and Dib, but this time Gaz wasn't laughing and Dib's face was actually full of pity for the little alien.

_Dib-stink…feeling pity for…me?_ Anger filled Zim. He turned back to Tak and said in a quiet voice, "Fine. You've won. When…if…we survive to get back to the future, you can have Earth, and I'll go back to Foodcourtia." And with that, he marched past Dib and Gaz towards Gettysburg.

* * *

Gir, meanwhile, was trying to decide what to do about Membrane and the police officer. After talking it out with the computer, Gir finally decided that to open the door in a little boy outfit would do. Computer was going to transmit to Gir what to say so Gir couldn't screw this one up.

"Hello? How may I help you?" Gir repeated what was in his head when he opened the door. Membrane and the officer looked down.

"Hello, little boy. Is your brother Zim home?" the officer asked.

Gir shook his head.

As though he were expecting his answer, the officer smiled. "Of course. Are one of your parents home?"

Gir shook his head again as Computer told him in his mind not to mention the Robo Parents. The officer stopped smiling. "How old are you?"

"EIGHT!" Gir screeched. He started giggling.

Membrane knelt down so he was at Gir's level. "Do you know what happened to my kids and your brother?"

"They…went….to…school." Gir recited the words that flashed through his head. "I…do not think…that you…should be here now. Come back…when my parents…are here." Gir giggled again. "And bring TACOS!"

Membrane stood up and looked at the officer. "He's right, we can't question a minor like this. And tacos would be nice." The office nodded in agreement and said to Gir. "We will be back."

"BYEEE!" Gir waved before he closed the door.

"We don't need tacos, Gir," Computer said, annoyed. "I didn't tell you to say that."

Gir jumped out of his boy costume. "No…but it'll take them a while to go across town and get tacos. That'll give us some time!" As he ran down to the base again, Computer said. "Yeah…actually…that was kinda smart. Good…job?"

Gir ignored Computer and started punching buttons. He knew the Tallest said they would call back, but things were starting to get more complicated now that the humans were getting more involved. After a moment, Tallest Purple appeared on screen.

"Yes, Gir?" he said.

"The humans were just here…Dib's daddy and a cop. They wanted to talk to Zim's parents." Gir gave a little sound of fear. "We stalled them for a bit, but I don't know to do when they come into the base. I'm only one robot!"

Purple shook his head. "You're a _SIR_ unit, you have lots of defensives."

"But Zim told me to never use them, they only destroy his stuff."

For the first time, Purple was regretting giving Zim a stupid SIR unit. "Well, just do the best you can. Red is in conference right now with our techies. We decided that Zim's disappearance like this puts all of Irk in danger. We don't want these humans to know of us…or that one of us was there." Purple reached off screen for some files. "We reviewed what Zim has sent us, and this access to nuclear technology these idiots have is disturbing. That planet has an itchy finger over the 'launch' button, and they are looking for any excuse to use it. We cannot have nuclear power launched anywhere, the effects of it being used in stupid hands could be catastrophic. Do you understand this?"

Gir nodded, "Kinda…I know that it's bad."

"Good enough. When Red comes back, we'll call." Purple signed off.

Gir took out his communicator to call Zim.


	6. Chapter 6

Holy Batcow! This is my longest chapter ever in my history of writing on here! Yay's for me! Oh...and sorry for the dialogue and some of the OC. They're trying to fit into 1863...they need to adjust a wee bit.

* * *

Zim lead the way to town, Dib walking a few paces behind, then Gaz, and Tak brought up the rear. No one said a word. They had just reached the outskirts when Zim started to beep. An old man sitting on a porch looked across at the four kids with a weird look. Zim immediately silenced his communicator.

Dib whispered to him, "There, an outhouse. Go." Zim ran over, ripped open the door and went in.

"Gir?" he whispered. Through the cracks he saw Dib walk over casually, to make sure no one got to close.

"MASTER!" Gir screeched. Zim turned down his volume as low as he could.

"Gir, you have to be quiet." With the volume down, Zim could hardly make out the robot's words through the crackle, but he listened as Gir told him the events of the last hour.

"Keep listening to the Computer…for some reason it's smarter than you," Zim said softly. He swallowed his pride and continued to ask, "And the Tallest, what did they say?"

"They're talking with the techies, and will get back to me as soon as they know what to do."

Zim raised an eyebrow. "They're going to help? Why?"

"Because of the threat to Irk…"

Zim snorted and interrupted Gir. "Yes…of course…the greater good." Gir went silent at the comment. He didn't know what to say. Dib knocked softly on the door, a signal to hurry up.

"I'll have my communicator sound off, and it might take me a while to answer, but call me anyways, ok?"

"Yes, master," Gir replied. Zim ended the transmission and exited the outhouse.

He gave Dib a grim look. "Good news or bad?" Zim asked.

Dib grimced too. "Bad first, I guess."

"Your father has finally decided to be a good parent. He's poking around looking for you…with the police," Zim told him as they walked over to Gaz and Tak.

"And the good?"

Zim gave a sarcastic smile. "My Tallest have deemed us worthy enough to be rescued." His smile fell to a look of disgust. "Yay me." They reached the girls.

"We're going to have to find a room for tonight," Dib said. A respectiful looking gentleman walked by. Dib walked over to him.

"Excuse me, kind sir, but could you tell me where some lodgings would be?" Dib asked.

The man smiled. "Why, of course." He pointed down the road to a large, white washed Southern plantation style house. "Miss Adelia's is the most welcoming place in town."

Dib nodded. "Thank you…"

The man held out his hand. "Cuthbert Wellwood, head of Home Guard for Gettysburg."

Dib could feel Zim tense behind him as he gave a nervous smile and shook Cuthbert's hand. "Thaddeus Flaherty."

"Enjoy your stay," Cuthbert tipped his hat to Gaz and Tak, who gave awkward curtsies, and continued on his way.

Zim was as pale as an Irken could get. "We need to get out of here as soon as possible. If Home Guard is here…and it's the end of June…they're going to be recruiting all over the place."

For the first time in a while, Gaz spoke. "It doesn't matter if they recruit you or not. Didn't Gettysburg get hit hard anyways during the battle?"

Dib wished Gaz had just stayed silent. "Let's just go to Miss Adelia's. She must be the same Adelia who is going to throw that ball."

As the kids walked down the street, it was clear that even though there was a war going on, no one in Gettysburg seemed to care. Sure, there were lists up at all the major stores of the casualties and dead, but everyone seemed to be talking about Miss Adelia's dance coming up.

"I wish we knew which day it exactly was," Tak said. They walked up to Miss Adelia's porch and knocked on the door. A stout black woman in an apron and worker's cap came to the door.

"Yes'm?" she asked.

Zim cleared his throat. "Is Miss Adelia here?"

The black woman nodded. "Ye'suh. Who's a'callin'?"

"Tired patrons looking for a place to put up," Zim replied.

The black woman disappeared for a few moments and returned with a tall, thin white woman. She was dressed in a simple day dress and had her auburn hair up in a loose bun. Her right hand had ink on it, as though she was in the middle of writing a letter.

"Yes, I am Adelia Lane." She took in the sight of the four young children. "My word, you look as though you've just arrived from the battle field!"

Zim decided to run with this lie. He moved his foot backward and put pressure on Dib's foot, signaling him to follow his lead. "I'm afraid miss that we have. See…" he hung his head. "Our parents…"

Zim didn't need to say anymore. Adelia opened the screen door to let the kids in, a look of kindness on her face.

"Oh, my dear little ones. Yes, yes you may come and stay." She tutted and muttered to herself. "This horrid war…making orphans left and right." Adelia lead them into a parlor.

"Sit, sit," she motioned as the black woman walked in with a tray of drink and food.

Smiling, Adelia introduced her servant. "This is Silly." Silly nodded as she poured tea. Zim and Dib eyed their tea while Tak and Gaz gratefully nodded to Silly and took big sips.

Once the children had been fed and rehydrated, Adelia asked, "Now, you must introduce yourselves."

Zim and Dib both had their mouths full, so Tak introduced them. By now, she didn't need to think twice about their names. Adelia gave each a warm smile.

"And tell me, how long would you like to stay?"

Zim swallowed. "Uh…we aren't sure about that…"

Adelia seemed to understand. "Of course," she shook her head and tutted again. "I've had so many travelers from this war…uncertain futures. You needn't tell me what happened, it's all the same in the end. You are welcome as long as needed."

"Thank you," Gaz said.

"However, I am the fullest I have ever been before, so I have only one room to offer. Will that be alright?"

"Yes m'am," answered Zim. "Anything is much appreciated."

A moments silence passed as the kids finished eating. Once Adelia was satisfied they'd had enough, she rang a bell for Silly to come take the tray away. As Silly did this, Adelia said, "Now, you are lucky you arrived today. Tomorrow I am holding my annual Summer Ball. You must attend!"

The kids exchanged looks of uncertainty. Gaz stumbled over the correct words. "Uh…we would…be delighted, m'am. But…what would we wear?" She motioned to their clothes. "These are all we have."

Adelia waved a hand. "Silly is the best seamstress in all of Virginia! Have her take your measurements today, and all four of you will look like new shiny half-pennies tomorrow."

Zim was uncomfortable. "No…we couldn't impose…"

Adelia stood up. "No, I shant take anything but 'yes' for an answer." She motioned for the kids to follow. "But first, you must be tired. Come, I shall show you to your room, and you may rest."

They followed Adelia up to the second level. She lead the way down a long hallway and opened the door to a fantastically large and bright room. There was a giant four-post bed on one side, a vanity, a washstand, and an exit to a balcony.

"I'm sorry there is only one bed…" she said as she walked to one of the large closets.

Dib shook his head. "Please…we are greatful just to have a warm place to stay. The girls can have the bed…Zi…er, Judah and I will be comfortable on the floor."

Adelia smiled at Dib and pulled out extra quilts and two pillows. "Well, here you are. We sup at seven, but I shall send Silly up to measure you before then?"

Zim nodded in agreement. Adelia turned to leave when Zim asked, "Miss Adelia, we have been traveling for a few days, and I'm afraid we've lost track of the days. Could you tell us the date?"

"Of course, my dear. It is June 29th."

* * *

Tak told Dib that he could share the bed with Gaz, considering that Irken's don't really need sleep anyways. Neither child disagreed with having to sleep with their sibling and were snoring softly under the soft comforter in under five minutes flat. Zim had wondered out to the balcony and was sitting in silence, watching the 1863 humans go about their business. Tak browsed through the book collection in the room.

Every so often, she would look outside to Zim. The books were interesting, but she was surprised to find herself worried about how Zim was going to react to what she had shown him.

Gaz rolled over and Dib mumbled something. Satisfied that they were asleep, Tak went out on the balcony, closed the door softly, and sat down on the other side of Zim. He was resting his head back against the wall, face tiled towards the sun with his eyes closed. He was breathing in a meditation routine young Irken's were taught to relax themselves. Tak sat in silence, feeling out Zim's rhythm, and found it actually was relaxing.

After a while, Zim blinked his eyes open and looked back out on the street. Higher end humans were lazily walking in the sunshine while black slaves and white endentured servants ran about doing their master's biddings.

Curious, Tak commented, "I do not understand this war. All the humans look the same to me. It's like if the Irkens with red eyes enslaved us with purple. The darker ones outnumber the lighter ones in the South…how could they not take matters into their own hands? Why would the Tallest of this world allow this kind of discrimitation? It disrupts development."

When Zim didn't answer right away, Tak figured he was still to angry to talk. She was about to get up again and go back inside when he sighed.

"That's just it, Tak. This isn't Irk…it's Earth. Not only are they humans, not Irkens, but they are isolated from the rest of the Universe." He waved a hand to take in all that they were looking at. "This is all any of them know…there is no other species of intelligence to challenge or fear. And one basis of society is the need to create an 'other', so why not nitpick?"

"But why skin color? It's just different clusters of their pigment…it has nothing to do with smartness or capability."

Zim shrugged. "Earth is a slow planet…domestication of plants was only ten thousand years ago…animals eight thousand. The technology we see here will last for about another seventy years before motored vehicles really take off." He sighed again. "And in the 21st century they still haven't figured out yet how to describe 'race' and 'identity'."

"Huh," Tak said softly. "You sure know a lot about Earth's history."

Zim shrugged again. "They have a lot to offer in ways of society study…but nothing more."

Tak stopped herself from asking _So why haven't you conquered it yet_, but Zim could tell the question hung on her mind. He looked at her.

"Haven't you done enough damage today?" Zim asked bitterly. Tak looked down at her feet. Something stirred inside Zim. Tak was genuinely sorry that the argument had escalated like that, he could tell, and a strong urge overcame him to try to make peace. _Besides_, he thought, _fighting right now won't solve anything. We need to concentrate on how to get out of here._

"If you plan on taking over this world," Zim said in a joking voice, "you're going to need to know that they don't have 'Tallest' here. A lot of them grow to an average height of over 5 and a half feet. President Man is the ruler." He gave a small smile.

Tak smiled back. "Good to know!"

This new bond between Tak and himself bothered Zim. Sure, many young Irken formed bonds of friendship…he actually had one or two closer friends despite everything he'd done to Irk. Friendship wasn't really discouraged on Irk…but the issue of intimate bonds was never addressed. Zim gasped inwardly at the thought of an "intimate bond". He looked at Tak out of the corner of his eyes.

She was watching some kids play a game of ball in the street and was trying to figure out the rules of the game. Zim noted that she had a shade of green that was rare on Irk, and it actually suited her in her blue eyes and dark wig. Zim frowned to himself. _Attraction? NEVER! This is an emotion not programmed into Irken Paks…_

The door opened behind them as Dib walked out yawning. "Silly was just here to see if she could take our measurements. She wants the girls first…so Zim, we have to get out."

Zim and Tak stood up and followed Dib inside. Gaz, though awake, was still lying in bed. She made a face at Tak.

"We have to try on some of Adelia's old dresses and then Silly is going to make adjustments."

Dib and Zim left Tak and Gaz to talk about how stupid these 19th century dresses were and walked downstairs to the parlor that Adelia had received them in earlier. The house was quiet…most of Adelia's visitors were out for the day, making calls and running errands. They sat opposite each other, Dib in a rocking chair and Zim stretching out on a couch.

"Sleep fine?" Zim asked, half not caring for an answer but wanting to fill the silence.

Dib shook his head. "I kept going over statistics in my head. Tomorrow is the 30th…and then the 1st of July. I was trying to remember when the first shot was fired, by whom…and where. I don't want to be in that part of the city if we're still here."

"I'm sure the techies will have something figured out by then," Zim answered. "I'm more worried about tomorrow night."

Dib raised an eyebrow at the fact that Zim was confiding in him. "Really? Why?"

"We're going to have to dance and stuff. When was the last time you participated in the Virginia Reel?"

A small look of horror at what Zim had said came over Dib's face, but then Zim suddenly started to vibrate on the couch. Startled, Zim yelped out and launched himself onto the floor where he proceeded to vibrate.

Dib laughed. "What are you doing?"

Zim pushed a button on his Pak and stopped vibrating. "My communicator's on silent!" he said angrily as Dib laughed louder. Zim looked out the door to the hallway to see if anyone was around. Satisfied, he answered the call.

"Gir?"

"No," Tallest Red voice crackled through. "We decided to try and see if we could reach you directly."

Zim frowned. "How? I'm not connected to you…"

"Gir is transmitting this. But forget that…where are you?"

"Gettysburg," Zim answered flatly. He was annoyed the Tallest were calling him directly. "It's June 29th," he added.

Red paused before he asked, "Why should the date matter?"

Zim groaned. "It just does. We need to be out of here in two days or our survival isn't guaranteed." _Like you would care..._he added in his mind.

Red noted Zim's attitude. "You will not address the Tallest that way, private. The techies are working on reversing the Jumper."

Zim didn't like being repremended in front of Dib, so something small snapped inside him. "Private? I've been degraded now? Or is private one up from Invader now?"

"What? Zim, what are you talking about? It doesn't matter what you're called right now, what matters is getting you back and reversing what those humans have seen…"

"Oh, gee…I thought you were doing this out of kindness," Zim said sarcastically.

Red was shocked. "Hold your speech, _Invader_, or I will have you disbarred!"

Zim swallowed his pride again and answered, "Yes…my Tallest."

Red ended the transmission. Zim looked over at Dib who was trying to look as though he didn't hear the exchange. Annoyed at the situation, Zim huffed over to the bookshelf. He was half reading the titles when he came across the book _Beadle's Dime Ball-Room Companion and Guide to Dancing_. He took it out and flipped through the pages.

* * *

On the Massive, Red was sitting in silence, reviewing the conversation with Zim. Zim's anger bothered the Tallest, and he worried about what Tak had been saying to him. Sure, Zim was stupid with logic…but he was exceedingly intelligent in other areas that could be devastating to the Armada and Irk. If Zim found out…he shook his head as Purple came into the communication area.

"What?" Purple asked, snacks in his hand.

"I contacted Zim…he was acting weird."

"Weirder than normal?"

Red nodded. "Unfortunately, yes." Red thought for a moment. "He mentioned that the date was June 29th. Why should that matter?"

Purple shrugged, not really caring.

Red turned to one of the Communicators. "Bring up everything you can find with the words 'Earth', 'Gettysburg', '1863'…and look up an Earth calendar for that year." He turned back to the screen as information started to pop up. "I want to know what's really going on."

* * *

After Gaz and Tak were measured, Silly called the boys up and got their numbers as well. When she had finished, she told them that supper was to be served at 7, and Miss Adelia said they were free to roam about her land.

"She'as some mighty fine horses in the barn," Silly said. "Young'ins dun't need to be a'fearing war, they need to be out playin', yes'suh." She shooed the kids outside. "Jest make shu you is back to wash befar suppah."

They looked at each other, shrugged their shoulders, and started to walk down the path to the big red barn. When they walked inside, they found four horses inside stalls- two were shades of brown, one was a paint, and one jet black. In the back of the barn there was a ladder leading to the loft.

Dib and Gaz, surprisingly, knew how to ride horses and started to saddle each one. Zim, crawled up into the loft to see what it looked like. Tak followed him.

"You know," Zim said thoughtfully as he watched Dib and Gaz move about. "I actually haven't been outside that city since I arrived. This is my first time in the…I think it's called _country_."

Tak didn't say anything as she picked up some hay to study it. Zim watched her. "Tallest Red called," he said.

She dropped the hay. "Really? And?"

Zim shrugged. "The techies are working. We just need to wait."

"I figured that…what I was asking was how did it go talking to him?"

Zim grimced a smile. "Well…if I'm not disbarred and deactivated for disappearing in front of thousands of the enemy, I will be for disrespecting a superior."

"HEY!" Dib called up. "Let's go!"

Zim and Tak used their Paks to hover down to the main level. Dib frowned. "That was annoying." He was leading one brown horse and the black one, and Gaz had the other two.

"The black one and paint seem to have the mildest tempers, so you two can have those. Riding a horse is simple, really. To get on you…" Dib stopped in mid sentence as he watched Tak and Zim climb up onto their respectful horses in graceful ease. Dib's frown got deeper as he hopped on his as well.

"Where did you learn to ride horse?"

Tak was leaning forward to pat the paint's neck. "These animals aren't unlike some of the ones we've ridden on other worlds."

Gaz was leading the way out of the barn as she called back, "So, then why did Dib and I have to saddle them?"

Zim laughed. "Cause we didn't want to."

Gaz growled and once she was outside the fence, clicked to her horse and nugged it to a slow canter. Tak kept her paint behind as she examined the field around her. The vegetation was alien to her, and her natural curiosity was kicking in. Dib trotted his horse next to Zim's black one until they were walking side by side. Zim didn't notice, however, as he was watching Tak study a bush of flowers. Dib leaned over a poked him.

"Stare much?"

Zim rubbed his arm. "I have no idea what you are talking about," he answered.

Dib snorted. "Last time I saw you look at something like that, you were eyeing some of my dad's latest inventions. What's up?"

Zim didn't want to talk about what was going through his Irken mind…especially with Dib. He saw a hill up ahead.

"Nothing's up…last one to the hill takes off the saddles!" He yelled angrily as he kicked his stallion hard in the ribs and sent it off in a full gallop. Dib egged his mare on too, spurring after the alien.


End file.
